From a Negative to a Positive
 |
| Photo by Katrina Wright on Unsplash |
As noted by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (Kübler-Ross E & Kessler D, 2014) the five stages of grief are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. This does not mean that the grieving must go in this order. Just like how everyone grieves about different things, the grief process can look different for one person versus another.
So, why am I talking to you about grief? Since I started my undergrad program, I knew that I wanted to help people. At first, I thought I wanted to become an elementary school teacher, but my path went in a different way when I decided that teaching was not for me. Little did I know, at the time, that I was in a grieving process of my own from having to extend time at school.
After changing majors, I continued on in the field of Human Development and Family Studies. I did not know what I wanted to do with this major, other than the fact that I still wanted to help people. During the second summer of my undergrad program, I volunteered for a camp that helped young children and adolescents process through their own grievances. I volunteered for more than one summer, and this helped me to decide what I wanted to do with my degree. I wanted (and still want!) to become a grief counselor.
There is another reason I have decided to discuss grief in this open format: in the early months of 2017, I had something happen that changed my life. I had a virus attack my brain and spinal cord. Everything had changed from the time that I had gotten sick. I lost my ability to walk, talk, and the freedom to do whatever I wanted to do. My life became full of all new challenges and adventures. However, with those new times, came new grievances. I had to find a new normal, and at times, grieved for what I once had.
I grieved the loss of utilization of my legs, among other things. Along with all the negative aspects that grief brings, it also bring acceptance. I had decided to accept my "new normal" and the grieving process that could easily be negative, became a positive experience at many different times. There are many people who say that I am an inspiration to them because of what has happened to me. However, if I can make a positive influence on at least one person, because of the ways I have learned to cope in a positive manner, I know that I have made a difference.
There are many times in life where our actions, in any given topic, can negatively or positively effect someone else just by our actions. My goal for becoming a grief counselor and even just by living my own life, is to help others in ways that can positively change them.
I will never forget the times and the people that have positively changed my life at different times in my education, my recovery, and in my life, in general. I hope, in the future, that I am this to many people. I'll leave you all with a quote that has inspired me to never give up, no matter what life throws my way. It states, "What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." (Emerson, n.d.).
Never forget that things may seem too big to overcome, but we have the strength to get through anything.
****
Sources:
Emerson, R.W. (n.d.). A quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson. Retrieved June 25, 2020, from: https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/15579-what-lies-behind-us-and-what-lies-before-us-are
Kübler-Ross, E, Kessler D (2014). On grief & grieving: finding the meaning of grief through the five stages of loss. New York: Scribner. ISBN: 9781476775555. OCLC 863077888
****
Disclaimer: Please remember that these are real stories as we remember them. We are not therapists and are NOT qualified to diagnose, treat, or provide counseling. The coping strategies shared in our stories are what we found to be useful and may not work for everyone. Some of the content, as mentioned above, may be triggering. If you need to reach out, please call 911, or go to your local hospital or stress center. Additional resources include the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-(800)-273-TALK (8255); the National Hopline Network: 1-(800)-442-HOPE (4673); the Crisis Test Line - Text "HOME" to 741741 to connect with a crisis counselor; and the National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-(800)-799-SAFE (7233).
****
Jess is a 2015 graduate from Pennsylvania State University, and has her bachelors degree in Human Development and Family Studies. She currently lives in Pennsylvania with family. Jess' hobbies include spending time with her loved ones, swimming, and dancing, and plans to pick up these hobbies again soon. Jess is currently finishing up her Masters degree at Capella University in Clinical Mental Health Counseling and recovering from a previous illness.
Comments
Post a Comment